What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?

Skeet.
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What do envelopes say when you lick them?

Nothing, it shuts them up!
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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How many teenage girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One, but she'll be on the phone for five hours telling all her friends about it.
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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