What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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Middle C, E-Flat and G walk into a bar.

Sorry, says the barman, we don't serve minors.
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What did the rug say to the floor?

Don't move, I've got you covered.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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