What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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Who's richer — the butcher, the baker, or the candlestick maker?

The baker, because he has lots of dough.
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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