What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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Where do computers go to dance?

The disk-o!
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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