What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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What cell phones do travelling nuns use?

Virgin mobile.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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If you don't know what introspection is,

you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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The new band called 1023MB.

They haven't had any gigs yet
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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