What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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Why don't lawyers go to the beach?

Cats keep trying to bury them.
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That's a software problem.
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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The stormtrooper was enjoying the Wookie steak,

but it was a little Chewie.
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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