What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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What kind of jam can you not eat?

A traffic jam.
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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