What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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What did the clock do after it ate?

It went back four seconds!
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Why didn't the girl take the bus home?

Because her mom would make her take it back.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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