What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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How many punk rockers does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and seventeen on the guest list.
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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What's green and flies as fast as a speeding bullet?

Super Pickle!
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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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What kind of table has no legs.

A multiplication table.
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