What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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What's black and white and red all over?

A newspaper!
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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Why did Venus have to get an air conditioner?

Because Mercury moved in.
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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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