What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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What was the farmer doing on the other side of the road?

He was catching all the chickens!
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What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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How many WASPs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Silly, WASPs don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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