What do lawyers wear in court?

Lawsuits.
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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Interesting story, the guy who helped me learn algebra never farted around anyone.

I mean he did say he was a private tutor.
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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What did Cinderella say to the photographer?

Some day my prints will come.
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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