What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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