What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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How many chiropractors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but it takes six visits.
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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