What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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Why did the cucumber call 911?

It was in a pickle!
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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