What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

You crack me up!
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How do you open the great lakes?

With the Florida Keys.
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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Why should you never tell a secret in a corn field?

Because there are too many ears.
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What did the baby corn ask the mother corn?

Where is pop corn?
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Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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