What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?

Skeet.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?

Not enough cement.
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

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How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
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