What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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Why didn't the rooster cross the road?

Because it was chicken.
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What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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Why does the Easter Bunny have a shiny nose?

His powder puff is on the wrong end.
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Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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