What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear

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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!

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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.

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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."

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What do you call a song sung in an automobile?

A cartoon.

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What starts with E, ends with E and only has one letter?

An envelope.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.

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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.

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