What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear

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There was a rooster sitting on a top of a barn. If it laid an egg, which way would it roll?

Roosters don't lay eggs!

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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."

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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."

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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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