What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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What is an astronauts favorite key on the keyboard?

The space bar!
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How many believable, competent, ``just-right-for-the-job'' presidential candidates does it take to change a light bulb?

It's going to be a dark 4 years, isn't it?
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How many assholes does it take to change a light bulb?

None; assholes never see the light anyway.
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