What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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What's the one thing that never works when it's fixed?

A jury.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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