What do you call a beautiful woman on a trombonist's arm?

A tattoo.

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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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How many mathematicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. He gives it to six Californians, thereby reducing the problem to an earlier joke...

In earlier work, Wiener [1] has shown that one mathematician can change a light bulb.

If k mathematicians can change a light bulb, and if one more simply watches them do it, then k+1 mathematicians will have changed the light bulb.

Therefore, by induction, for all n in the positive integers, n mathematicians can change a light bulb.

Bibliography:

[1] Wiener, Matthew P., <11485@ucbvax>, Re: YALBJ, 1986
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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What is Donald Trumps favorite song?

ICE ICE Baby......
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What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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What do you call a belt made out of watches?

A waist of time!
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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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