What do you call a beautiful woman on a trombonist's arm?

A tattoo.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?

She stole his heart.
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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What do you call a parrot that flew away?

A polygon
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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Two girls were born on the same day, same year, same parents, except they are not twins. Explain:

They are triplets.
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Doc, I can't stop singing the 'Green Green Grass of Home'. He said: 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome'. 'Is it common?'I asked.

'It's not unusual' he replied.

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