What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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