What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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How many Jewish American Princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call Daddy, and one to get the (pick one:) mineral water/Tab.
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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How do you make a rock float?

Put it in a glass with some ice cream and root beer.
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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