What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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