What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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What's green and flies as fast as a speeding bullet?

Super Pickle!
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What is the world's longest punctuation mark?

The hundred yard dash.
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

"Many hands make light work."
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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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