What do you call a cow that's just given birth?

[De-Calf-Inated]
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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What do you call a cow with three legs?

Lean beef.
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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How many gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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