What do you call a cow that's just given birth?

[De-Calf-Inated]
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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A sandwich walks into a bar.

The barman says "Sorry we don't serve food in here"

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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer on a motorcycle?

The vacuum cleaner has the dirt bag on the inside.
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What do you call a fairy who doesn't take a bath?

Stinker Bell.
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