What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher?

One minds the train, one trains the mind.
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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