What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pitbull?

Lipstick.
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What has legs but doesn't walk?

A bed.
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