What do you call a fake noodle?

An impasta
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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What did Cinderella say to the photographer?

Some day my prints will come.
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Two satellites decided to get married.

The wedding wasn't much, but the reception was incredible!
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What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?

Owlgebra
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three, One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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How many cats does it takes to screw in a light bulb?

You can throw away your light bulbs. Just douse the cat with gasoline, light it up with a match, and you'll have all the light you need. (Comment: BLEAH!)
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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