What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?

Because he was feeling crumby.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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What do you get if you enroll in a liberal arts program and the only subject you do well in is music?

A natural major.
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Do you know what the Queen's father was called?

King.
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