What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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What is the definition of a "crying shame"?

There was an empty seat.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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