What do you call a parrot that flew away?

A polygon
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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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How do you catch a unique bird?

Unique up on it.
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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What do clarinetists use for birth control?

Their personalities.

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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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There was an explosion at a cheese factory in France...

all that was left was de brie.
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