What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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Who can hold up a bus with one hand?

A crossing guard.
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What letter can you drink?

T (tea)
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What's a light-year?

The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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Why did the TV cross the road?

Because it wanted to be a flat screen.
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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