What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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What room can you not go into?

A mushroom!
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How many Bratzlaver Hasidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find a bulb that burns as brightly as the old one.
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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'Have you got anything for wind?'

So he gave me a kite.

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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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