What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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what do you call a tick on the moon?

A luna-tick
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What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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