What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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Why to lawyers wear neckties?

To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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Why were the teacher's eyes crossed?

She couldn't control her pupils.
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How do chickens get strong?

Egg-cersize.
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What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on?

He caressed it softly and told it that he loved it

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What do planets like to read?

Comet books!
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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