What do you call a snarky criminal going down the stairs?

[A Condesending con descending]
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!
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