What do you call a snarky criminal going down the stairs?

[A Condesending con descending]
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be baygulls!
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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How many actors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. They don't like to share the spotlight.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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