What do you call a snowman in the desert?

A puddle!
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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish

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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. It turned itself in.

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How do you open the great lakes?

With the Florida Keys.

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The stormtrooper was enjoying the Wookie steak,

but it was a little Chewie.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos

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How many big black monoliths does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry, light bulbs are an evolutionary dead end.

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What do an accordion and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.

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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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