What do you call a snowman in the desert?

A puddle!
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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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A jump-lead walks into a bar.

The barman says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything"
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Why did the farmer wear one boot to town?

Because he heard there would be a 50% chance of snow!
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?

When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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