What do you call a snowman in the desert?

A puddle!
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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What do you call a cow that's just given birth?

[De-Calf-Inated]
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