What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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There was a rooster sitting on a top of a barn. If it laid an egg, which way would it roll?

Roosters don't lay eggs!
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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What do you call a snarky criminal going down the stairs?

[A Condesending con descending]
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