What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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What makes music on your hair?

A head band!

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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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What do you call two banana peels?

Slippers.
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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