What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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Interesting story, the guy who helped me learn algebra never farted around anyone.

I mean he did say he was a private tutor.
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So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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There was an explosion at a cheese factory in France...

all that was left was de brie.
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How many mathematicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. He gives it to six Californians, thereby reducing the problem to an earlier joke...

In earlier work, Wiener [1] has shown that one mathematician can change a light bulb.

If k mathematicians can change a light bulb, and if one more simply watches them do it, then k+1 mathematicians will have changed the light bulb.

Therefore, by induction, for all n in the positive integers, n mathematicians can change a light bulb.

Bibliography:

[1] Wiener, Matthew P., <11485@ucbvax>, Re: YALBJ, 1986
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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