What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!
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So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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