What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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"I said to the Gym instructor "Can you teach me to do the splits?" He said, "How flexible are you?"

I said, "I can't make Tuesdays"

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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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What do you get if Bach falls off a horse but has the courage to get on again and continue riding?

Bach in the saddle again.

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