What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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What's the definition of perfect pitch?

When you toss a banjo in the garbage and it hits an accordion.

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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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Why did the orange stop in the middle of the hill?

It ran out of juice!
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What's the first thing a musician says at work?

"Would you like fries with that?"

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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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