What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile

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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?

Not enough sand.
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What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.

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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday

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