What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom
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How many Californians does it take to change a light bulb?

Six. One to turn the bulb, one for support, and four to relate to the experience.
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Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder?

he got a little behind in his work.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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