What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What did the ceiling say to the chandelier?

You're the only bright spot in my life.
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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