What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.

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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle

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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."

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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.

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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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How many "pro-lifers" does it take to change a light bulb?

Six: two to screw in the bulb and four to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
None; the bulb will change itself when it is ready.

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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.

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A seal walks into a club...



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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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