What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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How do you tell you're kissing a french horn player?

He/She keeps trying to stick their fist up your butt.

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What do lawyers wear in court?

Lawsuits.
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What 7 letters did Lizzy say when she opened the refrigerator and found it empty?

O I C U R M T
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What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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