What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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A jump-lead walks into a bar.

The barman says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything"
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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What did Michael Jackson say to Woody Allen?

Got two fives for a ten?
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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