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What do you do when your chair breaks?
Call a chairman.
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Why do cows wear bells?
Because their horns don't work.
There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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Why don't bears wear shoes?
What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks.
They charged one - and let the other one off.
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How do you make a goldfish old?
Take away the g
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Where do mice park their boats?
At the hickory dickory dock.
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What is black and white and red all over?
A skunk with a rash.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?
Decalfinated
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.
Blue sky at night: day.
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