What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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What country makes you shiver?

Chile.
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How many ergonomicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. Four to decide which way the bulb ought to turn, and . . .
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land safely?

With its sparrowchute.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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What's in the middle of nowhere?

The letter H.
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Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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