What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on?

He caressed it softly and told it that he loved it

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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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What do lawyers wear in court?

Lawsuits.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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