What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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A seal walks into a club...
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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How many IBM PC owners does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but she/he'll have to go out and buy the light bulb adaptor card first, which is extra.
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If the red house is on the left,the blue house is on the right,where is the White House?

In Washington, D.C.
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How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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