What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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My pastor, he ate too many beans.

He had in his own pews.
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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How does a train sneeze?

Ah-choo-choo!
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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