What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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What kind of dress can't be worn?

Address.
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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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