What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?

You can unscrew a light bulb.
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What did Cinderella say to the photographer?

Some day my prints will come.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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