What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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Who can hold up a bus with one hand?

A crossing guard.
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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