What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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What's the definition of perfect pitch?

When you toss a banjo in the garbage and it hits an accordion.

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Why are kindergarten teachers so good?

They can make little things count.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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What washes up on small beaches?

Microwaves.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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What kind of table has no legs.

A multiplication table.
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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