What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks.

They charged one - and let the other one off.

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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
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What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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