What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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So the Pillsbury Doughboy's pants fell off and I..

feel really weird about donuts right now.
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How many UNIX hacks does it take to change a light bulb?

As many as you want; they're all virtual anyway.
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What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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