What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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Do you know how to save a drowning lawyer?

Take your foot off his head.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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