What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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The new band called 1023MB.

They haven't had any gigs yet
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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What's a royal pardon?

It's what the queen says after she burps.
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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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Doc, I can't stop singing the 'Green Green Grass of Home'. He said: 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome'. 'Is it common?'I asked.

'It's not unusual' he replied.

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Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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