What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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How many times does Bill Clinton change a light bulb?

No one knows. Republicans automatically disbelieve him, and no one can ever trust a stinking liberal anyway.
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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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How do you make an egg laugh?

Tell it a yolk.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute?

A prostitute will stop screwing you when you're dead.
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