What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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How many Cabbage Patch dolls does it take to change a light bulb?

The question is irrelevant, since you couldn't find the dolls even if you knew how many. (Note: Well, this was a good joke in 1983-84. . . .)
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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