What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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Who earns a living by driving his customers away?

A taxi driver.
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How many Klingons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to screw it in, and one to stab the other in the back and take all the credit.
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Have you heard the joke about the butter?

I better not tell you, it might spread.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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