What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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A lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a trainload of terrapins,

What a turtle disaster

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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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