What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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Do you know how to save a drowning lawyer?

Take your foot off his head.
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How many chiropractors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but it takes six visits.
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