What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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How many thought police does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There never was any light bulb.

Notes: Probably the only really good light bulb joke of 1984.
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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What is only a small box but can weigh over a hundred pounds?

A scale.
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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If you drop a white hat into the Red Sea, what does it become?

Wet.
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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