What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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Why did the computer squeak?

Someone stepped on its mouse.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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