What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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How many existentialists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to screw it in and one to observe how the light bulb itself symbolizes a single incandescent beacon of subjective reality in a netherworld of endless absurdity reaching out toward a maudlin cosmos of nothingness.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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What did one tooth say to the other tooth?

The dentist is taking me out tonight.
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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How many gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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