What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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What did the light bulb say to its mother?

I wuv you watts and watts.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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What did the necktie say to the hat?

You go on ahead. I'll hang around for a while.
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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