What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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When is a door not a door?

When it's ajar!
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