What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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What's the difference between a tick and a lawyer?

The tick falls off when you are dead.
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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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