What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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Why are lawyers like nuclear weapons?

If one side has one, the other side has to get one. Once launched, they cannot be recalled. When they land, they screw up everything forever.
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Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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