What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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Why did the man take a pencil to bed?

Because he wanted to draw the curtains!
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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If you drop a white hat into the Red Sea, what does it become?

Wet.
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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