What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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What is black when clean, and white when dirty?

A blackboard.
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What do a baker and a millionaire have in common?

They are both rolling in the dough!
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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in mud, then cross the road again?

He was a dirty double crosser!
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I think I want a job cleaning mirrors.


It's something I could really see myself doing.
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Why won't sharks attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy.
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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Why is the French horn the most divine instrument?

Man blows into it, but God only knows what comes out

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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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