What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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What room can you not go into?

A mushroom!
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, provided there is a programmer around to explain how to do it.
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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