What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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I was having dinner with Garry Kasporov (world chess champion) and there was a check tablecloth.

It took him two hours to pass me the salt.
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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What did one flower say to the other flower?

Hey, bud!
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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I'll call you later.

Don't call me later, call me Dad.
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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