What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a liar?

The pronunciation.
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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Why did Mickey Mouse go to outer space?

He was looking for Pluto.
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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