What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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Where do you learn to make banana splits?

In sundae school.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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