What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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What does cheese like to drink?

Morbier
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They stopped a vulture from bringing his rotting carcasses on the plane

but he said "You said I could have two carry on items!"
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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Why is the French horn the most divine instrument?

Man blows into it, but God only knows what comes out

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Where do computers go to dance?

The disk-o!
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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