What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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