What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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Why is the French horn the most divine instrument?

Man blows into it, but God only knows what comes out

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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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