What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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How do you make Holy water?

Take regular water and just boil the hell out of it.
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute?

A prostitute will stop screwing you when you're dead.
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