What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, YES! That's what I bought the buggers for!

You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!"

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!
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How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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