What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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What do you call a snowman in the desert?

A puddle!
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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How does a pig go to hospital?

In a hambulance.
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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