What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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What goes up and down but never moves?

Stairs.
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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Middle C, E-Flat and G walk into a bar.

Sorry, says the barman, we don't serve minors.
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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How many members of the United Church of Canada does it take to change a light bulb?

How dare you be so intolerant! So what if the light bulb has chosen an alternative light-style?
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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