What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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Why did the melon jump into the lake?

It wanted to be a watermelon.
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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