What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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How many Klingons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to screw it in, and one to stab the other in the back and take all the credit.
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Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Snow.
Snow who?

Snowbody!
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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