What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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If a long dress is evening wear, what is a suit of armor?

Silverware.
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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