What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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How many Marxists does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Tooth-hurty.
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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