What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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What did Cinderella say to the photographer?

Some day my prints will come.
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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