What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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How many efficiency experts does it take to replace a light bulb?

None. Efficiency experts replace only dark bulbs.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!
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What are lawyers good for?

They make used car salesmen look good.
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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