What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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What is green and pecks on trees?

Woody the Wood Pickle.
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog.

It was a Shih Tzu
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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