What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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Why did the calendar write its will?

Its days were numbered.
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Have you heard the joke about the butter?

I better not tell you, it might spread.
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