What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?

About one third less than for a regular bulb.
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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