What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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The stormtrooper was enjoying the Wookie steak,

but it was a little Chewie.
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How many socialists does it take to change a light bulb?

One to petition the Ministry of Light for a bulb, 50 to establish the state production quota, 200 militia to force the factory unions to allow production of the bulb, and one to surreptitiously dial an "800" number to order an American light bulb.
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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