What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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What do you call a calf after it's six months old?

Seven months old.
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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How does a pig go to hospital?

In a hambulance.
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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What do you call a musician with a college degree?

Night manager at McDonalds

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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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