What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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Why were the teacher's eyes crossed?

She couldn't control her pupils.
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What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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If you don't know what introspection is,

you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
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What did one tooth say to the other tooth?

The dentist is taking me out tonight.
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Were does a boat go when it is sick?

To the dock.
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