What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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How many folk singers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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"My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance.

We'll see about that."

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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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Why is slippery ice like music?

If you don't C sharp - you'll B flat!

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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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How many APL hackers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There's a primitive for that.
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