What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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How do you handle dangerous cheese?

Caerphilly.
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Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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"My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance.

We'll see about that."

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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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